I have been writing letters to you as of late and that is something I enjoy doing, but some of my letters have been kept private, and since I am writing a lot lately, I want to also write letters to you that can be published.
Both the public & private letters that I write are accurate, from my perspective, but of course, sometimes it's good to discuss things one-on-one.
As I tell you in private & public, marrying you is one of the best decisions I ever made, and I can’t think of anything I did that was better.
You are the complete package, the evidence of that is the things I learned and the understanding I gained. It’s impossible to know everything and there is no true know it all, but it also is possible to learn some things, and here is what I learned w/You.
FALSE BELIEF ABOUT MARRIAGE:
- In the beginning of our marriage, I thought that getting married was about happiness. And I mainly thought that I would make you happy, that it would make me happy, and that we’d in turn, make other people happy. I believed that to be the perfect purpose, and at least sometimes, we most definitely filled those purposes, but I later found that marriage and even life for that matter, is NOT about happiness, it’s about LEARNING.
ABOUT MARRIAGE & LIFE:
- When we understand Reality (life, others & ourselves) and expect things that end up happening (realistic expectations) we are happy . . but when we don't understand reality, and expect things that don’t happen (unrealistic expectations) we suffer.
So happiness might be important, but it is founded on, gained and maintained through wisdom (seeing things as they are) and realistic expectations. This is one of the most important set of ideas that I learned, and I confirmed it to be true w/You.
Don’t ever forget, You are and will always be the most cherished aspect (along w/our family - it’s a package deal 🙂) of my life. Let's do our best to make this next decade grounded in reality, and let's adjust our expectations to reality (Life, Others & Ourselves) instead of expecting reality to adjust to our expectations.
Your husband & best friend,